It’s Sunday, the big game is here, and the excitement is real. The wings are hot, the drinks are cold, and you’re ready to watch some of the best athletes in the U.S. battle it out on the field. We love the spectacle, but at Thomson Safaris, we know that when it comes to speed, power, and appetite, pro footballers have nothing on the true MVPs of Tanzania.
As you settle in for the game, here’s how the pro stats stack up against the true wild cards of the Serengeti.
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The Matchup: Strength & Size
The Offensive Line vs. The African Elephant
During the big game, the offensive lines form a wall of humanity. The average lineman weighs about 325 pounds. A full starting line of five players tips the scales at roughly 1,625 pounds combined. That is a lot of pushing power.
But that entire line is lightweight compared to one African bush elephant.
A male bull elephant can weigh up to 13,000 pounds. That means a single elephant weighs as much as eight entire pro football offensive lines put together. If an elephant decided to rush the quarterback, the entire roster of both teams couldn’t hold him back.
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The Matchup: Speed
Wide Receivers vs. The Cheetah
We love watching a wide receiver break away for a touchdown. The fastest players in the game top out at around 22 mph in full pads. It takes them roughly 10 to 12 seconds to run the length of the field.
A cheetah would flag them for delay of game.
The cheetah is the undisputed champion of speed, accelerating from 0 to 60 mph in just three seconds. With a top speed of 70 mph, a cheetah could run the entire 100-yard football field in roughly three seconds flat. By the time a pro player crossed the 20-yard line, the cheetah would already be doing a touchdown dance in the end zone.
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The Matchup: Agility & Jumping
The Cornerback vs. The Impala
Pro defenders are famous for their vertical leaps, training for years to jump 30 to 40 inches into the air to swat away a pass.
The Impala does that in its sleep.
To escape predators, an impala can launch itself 10 feet (120 inches) straight into the air. That is three times higher than the best athletes on the football field. An impala could stand under the goalpost and clear the crossbar without a running start.
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The Matchup: The Feast
The Fans vs. The Lion
The big game day is the second-largest eating day in America (after Thanksgiving). The average fan will consume about 2,400 calories during the game—think nachos, wings, and pizza.
The King of the Serengeti respects your effort, but he plays in a different league.
Lions are “feast or famine” eaters. When a male lion sits down for a big meal, he can consume 88 pounds of meat in one sitting. That’s the caloric equivalent of eating 220 slices of pepperoni pizza or 500 buffalo wings in a single meal.
All images in this post are AI-assisted artwork
The Final Score
The big game is a great show—but if you want to see nature’s original all-stars pushing the limits of physics, you need a bigger stadium.
When you’re ready to trade the flatscreen for the real thing, join us on the plains of Tanzania for the greatest show on Earth.
